My Date with Jordan

The date was suppose to be originally at 8pm, but it got pushed down to 6pm, which was fine by me. At six he came and picked me up in his white Infiniti. My first thought was, ok, he seems to be financially well. Which is good after all the headaches I went through with my ex-boyfriend on all the money issue. We drove to the nearest Long Horn Steakhouse and there was no parking. He suggested the 99 down the road, it was also packed. We ended up at Texas Roadhouse, they have the best bread rolls.

During the car ride we were talking, having conversation, getting to know one another. At times it got silent but then either one of us would ask a question. When we got to the restaurant, it was like conversation didn't exist. I tried to get on common ground and talk about the Dominican Republic since we've both been there, but it died pretty fast and after that, I couldn't get a conversation started. In fact, he couldn't even look at me! He would look to his left, then to his right, but never straight at me. The whole time I was trying to suppress a laugh because it was just so awkward.

When we got back in the car, we were in conversation again! When we got to my house we kept talking and we may have stayed out there for a bit talking if I didn't cut it. I felt that he seemed uninterested and I just wanted the date to end at that point. He could have kept conversation flowing at the restaurant and not have kept it going only in the car. And if he doesn't like to talk while eating, why suggest a dinner date? He said he had a good time and I told him have a good evening. I don't think I'm going to hear back from him. It was all too weird.

Well, tomorrow is another one, and I may have a coffee date next week to add to the list.

Back into the World of Dating

I'm not sure just yet if I'm happy or not to be back on the dating scene, especially since the same assholes from last time are still there. However, it does pass the time and keeps me busy while I wait for June 1st to come along and finally start working. Although, once I do start working full time again, I may drop the dating scene once more.

Now, I know most aren't aware that every time I enter the dating scene it's through the help of online dating. The urge to date always comes when I'm back home, bored out of my mind, because let's face it, Massachusetts isn't all that exciting. Being back home, not working, no school, there's nowhere that I can meet boys. The guys at the local Starbucks are all ten years older than me or being dragged in by their girlfriends. My friends? They have suggested me dating someone but never pulled through. The only way to meet guys around my age is through the help of OkCupid, because let's face it, I'm not paying to send messages at other sites.

As of yet, I haven't been on a single date since I've gotten back into this unstable world. At first, I was going to deactivate my account again since I wasn't getting many messages. I forget that it takes time for the site to really start spreading one's profile around and that some days are really dry ones, while others, my inbox is all full. After 3-4 days, I was finally getting messages, cracking jokes, and exchanging numbers. Some of the guys seem really sweet, and then they are the wtf messages. "You know if you had a dick, we could totally have a sword fight!" Yeah...how classy. They make good stories with friends, don't worry, I don't meet them.

Tomorrow I have my first date. I think we're going out to dinner but I'm not sure, he wants to keep it a surprise. Which is kind of romantic but at the same time I'm a bit nervous because I don't really know him. Friday I have another date and I'm going to my first MLB game which I'm really excited about. As long as he likes me, I think it'll be a good time. Then Saturday I have another date and he asked me what I wanted to do which I told him to think of something. I'm waiting to see what we're doing and at what time. I think after each date I'm going to blog about them.

I know that I don't sound super excited to be dating again, but honestly, it's really nice to be called beautiful again.

I like to go to Barnes & Nobles and pick up a random fashion magazine to flip through. It's my relaxation time with a tall caramel macchiato. One of these magazines is Cosmopolitan, I sit there for about an hour going through the whole thing. It's not because I need sex or relationship advice, it just gives me a giggle reading some of the ridiculous things it tries to get us girls to do. My favorite is "The Things We Need to Start Doing." I rolled my eyes throughout the entire thing. It was four pages of 100 things that girls should start doing from sleep overs to eating a popsicle on a hot day. Yeah...

Well, as I was flipping through the magazine racks, I saw that they had a new and different Cosmo out, it was Cosmopolitan for Latinas. Now, this is different from Cosmopolitan en Español where it's all in Spanish and it's targeted primarily to readers in Latin America. The Latina version was geared specifically to Hispanic women (I hate the term Latino/a) living in the states and it was all in English with a few Spanish words here and there.

It was a rather thin issue that barely focused around sex. It had the bullshit quiz of which telenovela woman character are you, I got Betty La Fea (Ugly Betty). Then it had a few different dances throughout Latin America, as if us Hispanic women didn't know it already. It also gave us insights to some of the different nationalities and I did notice how overly sexual my nationality is.

Dominicans have two type of dances: merengue and bachata. (If you want to see it danced, youtube is great.) It described merengue as an intimate dance where the only two variations were close to the body and really close to the body. Then, when it got to bachata, well, it wasn't a dance anymore, it was sex. It quoted some comedian, I wish I remembered who. Bachata was described as a dance of the genitals where if you have trouble conceiving, this dance has no problem impregnating you and you will probably end up with a baseball player. I had to conquer all my will power not to burst out laughing in the quiet atmosphere of New Hampshire. (Since Borders went bankrupt, I have to go into another state for the nearest bookstore.)

Then, they had the usual few pages asking men a series of questions, the "guy's perspective." Now, what I liked about this is that they showed more than one race and culture. They had an American, Jamaican, Cuban, Dominican, and a Mexican. Every question that they had a response for the Dominican guy, it revolved around sex. In one part he went into details of a kinky thing a girl did which I will not repeat fully because the thought of having some guy's foot in my mouth grosses me out.

I enjoyed the magazine and I'm glad it didn't go overly stereotypical, even with Dominicans being portrayed as sexual beasts. I mean, we are known a bit for being good in the sack, that's nothing to be ashamed off. I'm just a bit sad that it's only a seasonal magazine because they showed amazing food that I've heard of but never seen. I now need to google recipes for pupusas and mofongo.

I'm in the middle of finals and I'm looking at my chemistry notes on batteries wondering how the hell is this going to help me construct bridges or build highways. The introductory classes are a complete waste of my time as they are useless. These are classes where only 20% of the material is somewhat useful to my field. For example, I had to take physics two and learn about electricity when all I needed was thermodynamics and it's only taught for two weeks in the course. Yeah. I feel extremely frustrated and defeated because as much as I try to pound all these chemical equations into my head, I still don't understand it. I've gone through two tutoring appointments already and I don't feel prepared. It's a course full of incompetent professors throwing useless information that doesn't make any sense to me. I wish I had the knack for knowing which chemical compounds have hydrogen bonding, but I don't. So I sit in this class with a glassy stare because I can not begin to comprehend what's the professor saying. I hate going for the bare minimum, but I just need a D to pass this class and then it's out of my life. Unfortunately, even achieving a D in chemistry is hard. It's sad because in my engineering classes I'm getting Bs but these classes are seriously pulling me down.

Also, I'm starting to hate how shy I am around the opposite sex. Like one kid in my class that I've found cute since the start of the semester. During labs, he'll ask me if I'm using the equipment but I just stare back at him and he's staring back at me with those gorgeous blue eyes for an answer. Does my lips ever move to produce an answer? No. My friends have to reply for me because if not, he'll never know that we're done using the equipment and he can have it. Twice this has happened and twice I have remained speechless. This is a smart guy who's in higher level classes than I am, so the chances of us having a class together next semester are very slim. I could have struck up a conversation, befriended him, studied with him, and gotten to know him. But I am condemned by own shyness to be forever that girl who never replies back. And whenever I dare to look at him from across the room, he makes eye contact with me. Ugh, I need to work on this. Unfortunately, the only time I can talk to men is when I've had a few shots in me, can't exactly go drunk to class. Well, I can, but let's face it, my level of attractiveness at that point would be in the negatives.

Just two more finals left and I'm done. After chemistry tomorrow, it'll be a lot easier.

Ever feel that if you tell too many people something that you just may jinx it? Wether it's a new person in your life, school, work, etc. I have a friend that doesn't like to talk to someone about the people he's seeing because he feels that whenever he tells people, it never works out. Sounds silly but I can't help to have this mindset also and I've been keeping a lot of things to myself. Well, I'm about to burst, so fuck it.

Thursday, I had an interview for a research assistant position for transportation engineering. The position is only for the month of June, it's at my school but I would have to go to different sites throughout the state of Massachusetts collecting data, that is, going to intersections and counting cars. I was so excited to finally have an interview that I wasn't nervous at all. I smiled a lot and couldn't stop talking and interacting with them. I felt that the interview went well and literally as I was typing this up, I got the e-mail: I finally has a job in engineering! Yay! =D I'll be getting my experience in which I was so nervous about. Words can not describe my joy, appreciation, and excitement! I was hoping to get this position, I kept thinking about it. Weeeeee! Sorry, I'm just so excited! =D

Now, this position is at my school and my school is roughly two hours away from home, meaning, I need summer housing. The school does provide summer housing but it's around $3,000 for a month, no. I was talking to one of my friends about the possibility of this internship and he asked me where I was going to live. I smiled at him and told him I don't know. Then, he went on to say that he'll have his apartment for the summer and that I can take one of the roommate's room and pay their portion of the rent. I need to contact him and see if that's still a possibility and told talk to one of the roommates and see if that's okay with them. If not, I have other friends that have places and I can ask them as well.

Here's the thing though, this particular friend, I have a crush on. Try as I may to not have feelings for him, it's hopeless. I try to think of all his flaws and list them off, but then I end up thinking about...well, let's just leave it at that. I spend a lot of time with him doing homework, studying, and working on lab reports, expressing myself to him may break this. I'm doing very well in one class because I sit down with him and work on it, if I tell him and he feels too weirded out, I'm afraid that my grades will suffer. It'll be interesting to say the least if it ends up happening.

Either way, I'm so excited for this experience and to get another month away from home!